Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
