Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
