i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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