is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
