I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I could make wine with my vomit
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I need moral support for this bender
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
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