dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Damn victory sex feels great
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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