I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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