We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize