Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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