Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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