Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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