his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize