so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
Randomize
