We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
She told me I should be a condom model.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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