yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize