Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
