My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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