This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
