I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
