so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I'm jealous of your bromance
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
