"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize