Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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