just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
His nipple licking is glorious
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