I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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