I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
