You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
