I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
she pinky promised me she was 18
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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