If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I just want to make out with him forever
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize