the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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