His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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