ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
