Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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