no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
