So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
