instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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