The brown eye won't let me do that either.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
