Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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