Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
