haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Your penis caused this!
Randomize