He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
now i know why i became what i already was.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
