How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He shit in the fireplace
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
