Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
