I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Randomize
