he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
