I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Randomize
