in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
