I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
