singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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