no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
