And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Randomize
